Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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