just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
