idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
