Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
