My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
