was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
operation harelip BJ is a go
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
