don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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