it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
