love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
