so explain again why im purple
no
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize