This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
