can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
