bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
worst night to have a conscience
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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