dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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