did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Randomize
