I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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