i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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