Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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