I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
he shaved USA in his pubs
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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