You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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