I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I wish you could order shots online.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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