I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
