hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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