I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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