Me too!
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Randomize
