Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
