You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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