Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
