I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
