awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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