I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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