there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
