Already got asked if we're dating
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
