If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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