There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
