At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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