handjob tips. give me some.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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