Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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