can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
As shirtless as possible
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
