i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
