Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
