butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize