used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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