You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
