I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize