I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
