I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
