I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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