I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
