All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
then he tried to convert me to islam
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
