Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Randomize
